First of all: Pete. You're an Ass.
There. Moving on...
So April Fool's Day came and went with little effect on my life. What the hell kind of holiday is it anyways? It's about as trivial as "Slap Your Irritating Co-Workers Day." And really, who the hell celebrates that?! April was my boss' second month out on medical leave. The wierd thing about her entire illness is that after a month and a half none of the medical experts in the area have been able to pinpoint the cause of her condition. Does that say something poor about the Northwest Florida medical field or does is speak more of her character and how well she's handling the burdens she's been carrying. Once upon a time my team was a very close-knit group and it was one of the primary reasons why I loved coming to work everyday. Over the past 4 months that dynamic has shifted and not in a positive way at all. To think that my department's heyday has come in gone is depressing and I consider myself quite the optimist (...sometimes to the point of foolish, gullible behaviour) so I refuse to admit that these obstacles cannot be faced and overcome. Despite my efforts, these changes cannot occur without my team's participation. A (the boss) has plenty that she needs to change in order to regain what she lost with her team. K needs to continue softening her demeanor and working towards a relationship. (Kudos to her for making leaps and bounds in the last few months... It warms me to see her back to her "old self" when she shows it here and there.) M needs to re-energize himself; I haven't seen him enthused about our job and I miss that. It seems like Angie will finally be returning to work on Monday after over 2 months of being "away" and I can't deny that I dread the thought of our last month's progress going into reverse because she doesn't like the direction we're moving in. Compromise might not be her strong points.
On the home front, I'm fucking pissed. The last few weeks have consisted of people using me (or trying to) or my Mom under the pretense of "love" or "family." My Uncle, in Panama, has apparently triggered the disdain of his entire naighborhood by allowing his home (the one he inherited from my great-grandmother when she passed away) to go to shit. The tiny little 2 bedroom home that I fondly recall playing in as a child is now a drug den; Scum from all around stop by at various hours of the night to peddle and traffic in my "Abuelita's" kitchen and that breaks my heart. It breaks my heart to see my mother cry at night for a little brother that she sees wasting away in drugs; She feels obligated to keeping him safe, as she did when they were younger, and she drops to her knees and prays for him at every chance. So how is he trying to use us? Well, his neighbors are taking legal action against him and demanding that he restore the home to it's previous condition and clear out the narcotic threat in their community. Right on. I'm right there with them. He's calling us at all hours trying to get us to give him the money to clean the place up so that he can continue the facade under a new coat of paint some landscaping and perhaps a smile or two. Fuck you, Armando. It was bittersweet to hear my mother tell him that she wouldn't help him; I'm glad that she took that step and chose to save her meager earnings for herself and at the same time I feel for her because I know it pained her to turn away. So what came of it? Well apparently my other Aunt offered up the dinero and surprise! The house is partially painted and the rest of the money has magically dissapeared! I can't tell you how glad I am that it happened, too. Now my Mom can feel further justified in standing her ground and not offering up the cash; It just might be the only way left to help him. Let that serve as a lesson to anyone that would try to seek us out and use us. Being family does NOT give you free license to fuck me over, hide the truth from me or use me while you go back on your word or agreement. Straighten up, respect me enough to know that I'll find out when your lying and respect yourself enough to realize that you're keeping these secrets and playing these games because you KNOW that what you're doing is wrong.
So the diet and exercise thing is going fairly well. I haven't been able to weigh myself yet. I put my pride aside and I followed my tactless doctor's advice. I went to the local FedEx office to see if they had a scale large enough to measure me. No luck there so I'm still in the dark on how much I actually weigh. I've managed to move down to a 5x and that's a positive step in the right direction. These last two weeks have been bad. I've been eating well, which is great. My exercise regiment has faltered; I've left work at 7pm about every other night for the last two weeks and since the pool closes at 8pm I never make it in time to get my workout. I've needed to alternate my workout days for the sake of mounting deadlines and special projects. Now that we've hired an Interim Trainer to share the responsibilities, I can stop bending my schedule and personal obligations. I've come to miss my workout sessions when I don't fit one in. Maybe there is something to be said about the rumor that exercise highs are addicting. There's just a few days of April left and, being the optimist, I still see chance of turning it into a pretty good month.
There. Moving on...
So April Fool's Day came and went with little effect on my life. What the hell kind of holiday is it anyways? It's about as trivial as "Slap Your Irritating Co-Workers Day." And really, who the hell celebrates that?! April was my boss' second month out on medical leave. The wierd thing about her entire illness is that after a month and a half none of the medical experts in the area have been able to pinpoint the cause of her condition. Does that say something poor about the Northwest Florida medical field or does is speak more of her character and how well she's handling the burdens she's been carrying. Once upon a time my team was a very close-knit group and it was one of the primary reasons why I loved coming to work everyday. Over the past 4 months that dynamic has shifted and not in a positive way at all. To think that my department's heyday has come in gone is depressing and I consider myself quite the optimist (...sometimes to the point of foolish, gullible behaviour) so I refuse to admit that these obstacles cannot be faced and overcome. Despite my efforts, these changes cannot occur without my team's participation. A (the boss) has plenty that she needs to change in order to regain what she lost with her team. K needs to continue softening her demeanor and working towards a relationship. (Kudos to her for making leaps and bounds in the last few months... It warms me to see her back to her "old self" when she shows it here and there.) M needs to re-energize himself; I haven't seen him enthused about our job and I miss that. It seems like Angie will finally be returning to work on Monday after over 2 months of being "away" and I can't deny that I dread the thought of our last month's progress going into reverse because she doesn't like the direction we're moving in. Compromise might not be her strong points.
On the home front, I'm fucking pissed. The last few weeks have consisted of people using me (or trying to) or my Mom under the pretense of "love" or "family." My Uncle, in Panama, has apparently triggered the disdain of his entire naighborhood by allowing his home (the one he inherited from my great-grandmother when she passed away) to go to shit. The tiny little 2 bedroom home that I fondly recall playing in as a child is now a drug den; Scum from all around stop by at various hours of the night to peddle and traffic in my "Abuelita's" kitchen and that breaks my heart. It breaks my heart to see my mother cry at night for a little brother that she sees wasting away in drugs; She feels obligated to keeping him safe, as she did when they were younger, and she drops to her knees and prays for him at every chance. So how is he trying to use us? Well, his neighbors are taking legal action against him and demanding that he restore the home to it's previous condition and clear out the narcotic threat in their community. Right on. I'm right there with them. He's calling us at all hours trying to get us to give him the money to clean the place up so that he can continue the facade under a new coat of paint some landscaping and perhaps a smile or two. Fuck you, Armando. It was bittersweet to hear my mother tell him that she wouldn't help him; I'm glad that she took that step and chose to save her meager earnings for herself and at the same time I feel for her because I know it pained her to turn away. So what came of it? Well apparently my other Aunt offered up the dinero and surprise! The house is partially painted and the rest of the money has magically dissapeared! I can't tell you how glad I am that it happened, too. Now my Mom can feel further justified in standing her ground and not offering up the cash; It just might be the only way left to help him. Let that serve as a lesson to anyone that would try to seek us out and use us. Being family does NOT give you free license to fuck me over, hide the truth from me or use me while you go back on your word or agreement. Straighten up, respect me enough to know that I'll find out when your lying and respect yourself enough to realize that you're keeping these secrets and playing these games because you KNOW that what you're doing is wrong.
So the diet and exercise thing is going fairly well. I haven't been able to weigh myself yet. I put my pride aside and I followed my tactless doctor's advice. I went to the local FedEx office to see if they had a scale large enough to measure me. No luck there so I'm still in the dark on how much I actually weigh. I've managed to move down to a 5x and that's a positive step in the right direction. These last two weeks have been bad. I've been eating well, which is great. My exercise regiment has faltered; I've left work at 7pm about every other night for the last two weeks and since the pool closes at 8pm I never make it in time to get my workout. I've needed to alternate my workout days for the sake of mounting deadlines and special projects. Now that we've hired an Interim Trainer to share the responsibilities, I can stop bending my schedule and personal obligations. I've come to miss my workout sessions when I don't fit one in. Maybe there is something to be said about the rumor that exercise highs are addicting. There's just a few days of April left and, being the optimist, I still see chance of turning it into a pretty good month.
1 comment:
First off: Thank you, cuz when you call me an ass, I giggle.
Second: Good job on the exercising!
And third: Dork, comment moderation? Are you filtering me?
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